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Waiting in Hope

May 22, 2013 By 1 Comment

My family is in the midst of waiting. It was a message from God, “Wait and see.” So we wait. Not knowing what will happen but trusting in the One who is our provider and protector. I know that God has good things in store. It was promised in a word that was spoken over my husband. It is promised in His Word:

“For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith! Do not worry then, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear for clothing?’ For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:25-34 NASB)

What is all of this about? Why are we waiting on The Lord? Our business of ten years is closing down. I could go into all the details of government corruption and scandals, but I won’t. I won’t because there is a bigger picture. It’s a picture of God doing a mighty work in our family and preparing the path of a new journey. It’s a preparation, no a birthing of something new and wonderful in our lives.

We’ve asked people to pray for our family as we begin this new journey…a journey that will glorify God’s Kingdom. “To where?” You may ask. That is the excitement of it all. You see The Lord has covered both Russell and myself with a peace that passes all understanding. He has planted this seed of excitement for the next part of the journey.

People have asked my husband how he can be so calm in the midst of the storm. I tell you truth when I say as long as we keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, there is a calmness that comes over the both of us. When our human nature takes us off of our target, that is when we worry.

A dear friend reminded me this past weekend not to be a worrier but to be a warrior!! So we claim the truths of God in our lives. We walk by faith and not by sight. Many can not understand this. But we do. We have walked this path before. We have seen God provide when their was absolutely NOTHING. God has said don’t spend. We will be obedient. He will provide.

For our children, we speak truths with great excitement and faith. They are excited. It’s a new journey. We are reading about great missionaries from the past. Listening to God’s great works in their lives. They are learning about sacrifices and seeing God’s blessings in the midst of it all! They are witnessing God’s compassion on their lives! They are experiencing walking in faith as God provides for them.

The Lord has been good to us over the years. We have lived in abundance and have been faithful during that time of abundance. Just as Joseph helped the Egyptians through the time of plenty and stored up for the time of lean, The Lord has prepared us. God will continue to watch over our household.

Part of the word that Russell received was that God had to “move us to use us.” What type of move does He mean? We will have to wait and see. It’s really rather exciting to think that God has spoken so much over our family. The key for us is not to try to figure it out. We need not to jump ahead of God. We will require much wisdom and discernment during this time.

I know what many of you are thinking, “You family is so big, aren’t you worried?” NO! Our desire during this time is to completely trust in The Lord. Be encouragers to us at this time. Pray for clear direction. Do not come to us and encourage a “woe is me” mentality. It is during the storms in life that we raise our banners high!! This is a time to remind us of the greatness that God is! The greatness of God from the past, the present, and the future! God moves mountains! He created all that is. He is all powerful. Why would I not trust in that? Diving into the Word excites me beyond anything!

So now, we wait. We wait until God tells us it’s time to act. We go through the labor pains of birthing something totally new in our lives. Join us and pray for our family as we wait on The Lord! God is leading this dance and even though we don’t always hear the music, we keep on following His lead!

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Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (James 1:2-8 NASB)

Filed Under: God, Our Family Life, Trust, Walking in Faith Tagged With: , ,
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An Adoptive Mama’s Heart

May 14, 2013 By Leave a Comment

“ Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.” Galatians 6:9

 
The journey of being an adoptive mother can be a long and difficult road.  We can be overtaken by the spirit of rejection and the spirit of woundedness that can take over our own hearts.  After all, mothers were created to be the nurturers, but yet so often as the adoptive mother we end up becoming the punching the bag.  Our sensitive hearts begin to build a wall around it.  Its not just any wall…its a wall with brick and mortar…its tall and supportive…it is a fortress of protection.  
 
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I think the thing that affects adoptive mamas the most is the rejection of our love.  We welcomed our broken children with arms wide open ready to pour into them only to have it thrown right back in our faces.  Typically this opens up past wounds in our own hearts that never healed properly and sat in remission.  We want to take it personal.  Satan wants to whisper in our ears and our hearts and let us know that we aren’t good mothers.  He wants us to take those flaming arrows that are targeted for our hearts and believe that we are failures.
 
But sisters I tell you that Satan is a liar!  He is the father of all lies!  Satan cowers in the corner like a lion waiting to pounce on his prey. The mother’s heart is such an easy target for him because we are compassionate and when our compassionate attempts to love our broken children are rejected, we become wounded ourselves.  Satan is willing to do whatever to claim these precious children because he feels that they are his.  Their deep wounds allowed an open door for him to enter and feed the soul with lies.  Our children WERE easy targets for him.  But we know that if our children learn the truth, the truth will set them free.  Its a spiritual battle!  Our children come with their own walls built around their hearts!
 
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I spoke to a friend the other day who shared with me that she had adopted her son as a newborn.  Years had gone by and he had become a teenager.  All seemed well.  They had always been open with him about his adoption and his birth family.  One day her became terribly sick.  He was in the hospital for over 30 days.  She was back and forth to the hospital.  Grandma came to stay with the children when she was gone.  After her husband recovered and she was back to being home again, her son became defiant and built a huge fortress around his heart.  They kept pursuing his heart not understanding what was wrong.  Finally, he was able to verbalize that he felt like during this time his father being hospitalized that his parents had abandoned him.  Now he had been abandoned twice in his life.  He heard Satan whispering these things in his ear.  
 
My dear sister did not know that her son had struggled with abandonment all of these years.  But it was a deep wound that he carried around.  Wounds of the womb are real!  This second “abandonment” brought back deeply rooted wounds of the first abandonment.  I am happy to say that this child does know the truth and he was able to forgive both birth and adoptive families and begin a new life of being free from the bondage that Satan held over him.
 
For mother’s day I received beautiful letters and cards from all of my children.  There were two that stood out that brought tears of joy to my heart.  
 
One letter told me this (typed as he wrote it):
 
You look beautiful every day. Dear Mom, you are the best mom that I ever had.  God put you in my life for a reson, and I’m glad that he did. And one thing.  I love you and happy mother’s day!!! God loves you so very much!  I love you very much.  I hope you have a great day.
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This is from my son who has had a difficult time communicating.  God does wonders when we allow Him time to do His work!
 
My other letter said this (again typed as he wrote it):
 
Happy Mother’s day mom.  I hope you have a great day Mom and am so happy your my Mom.  I love you so much mom.  Thank you for being there wen am mad.  And some times I’m mad and I say I wish you were never my mom but you no I say that because am mad.  I love you which all my hart.  Happy mother’s day.  And I will help you with the garden.  I promos. And I have a play for you.  And God’s bless you through speaking and with so much more.  I love you mom.
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This is what makes our verse today come to life.  We can not lose heart in doing good!  We will reap in due time if we do not grow weary!  It comes in bits and pieces sometimes and other days it overflows like milk and honey!  Mamas keep plugging away at your child’s heart.  You will reap the blessings one day!
 
Dear Lord,
I just lift up all my adoptive mamas to you!  Help them not to build a fortress around their own hearts, but to handle the battle with the sword of Truth!  Help them to continue to love passionately as they work through their own issues of rejection.  I love you so much precious Lord!  Amen!
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The Wait

May 10, 2013 By Leave a Comment

Read Nehemiah 2:1-10
 

“Blessed be the Lord, who has given rest to His people Israel, according to all that He promised; not one word has failed of all His good promise, which He promised through Moses His servant.” 1 Kings 8:56

 
We pray.  We wait.  The wait can be long.  The journey can feel impossible.  But the praying must not stop.  Prayer must not be an excuse for laziness.  We don’t just pray the prayer and think, “Oh God will answer this.  I did my part.  The answer is either going to be ‘yes, no, or wait.’  It is during this time of waiting that continued prayer and crying out to God MUST happen.  After praying we should rise up and be more equipped for our work at hand!  I truly believe that the more time we spend in prayer with God over our situation, the more God will begin to reveal to us.  
 

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Going back to our study of Nehemiah, we discover that from the time of his first initial prayer that he waited well over one hundred days before finally sensing from the Lord that it was time to approach the king with his request.  I’m not sure about you, but for me, the longer I have to ponder on something, the more ideas I have and they begin churning in my brain.  I get excited about the things to come.  And through this process patience is building in my life.  God begins opening my eyes to the circumstances at hand and I begin learning through the circumstances.  Raymond Brown states this in his study The Message of Nehemiah :
 
“The time he spent with God multiplied those creative thoughts, provided new perspectives, and made him more prepared and composed that he would ever have thought possible.  In the quiet place, faith was renewed in a God who knows the best time for everything.  Believers constantly need to accept that behind life’s frustrations lies a divine purpose; something can be learnt from our most difficult experiences.”
 
I’m sure that Paul would not have wanted to be imprisoned.  I know that if I was him, I would have wanted to continue traveling and sharing the gospel from nation to nation.  But God had a different place for him during this time.  The circumstances of Paul’s imprisonment were to be glorified for God’s Kingdom.  The gospel continued to be spread.  Through his suffering God was glorified and lifted up.  Even when he was beaten, he could lift his hands and praise God.  
 
I can’t sit here and tell you why you may have the difficulties that you do have with your children who are brokenhearted.  But I do know that in the midst of the storm God is at work not only on your child, but on you!  Waiting for healing is not time wasted.  Waiting for healing is the beginning of healing.  I hold on tightly to the promises that God gives me in His Word.  I love how Brown states what Nehemiah did:
 
“He cast himself utterly upon God, believing that, however great the obstacles, he would be clearly led and given all the resources necessary for total obedience to God’s will.  Perplexed about the way ahead, millions of believers have pursued the same steps as Nehemiah and have not been disappointed.”
 
It all goes back to faith and believing in a BIG God!  Adoption was an act of obedience.  It was not promised to be sugar and spice and all things nice.  But it was called to be a journey.  And the healing and growing were not only for your child, but for you as well.  The things I have learned on this journey of raising fifteen amazing children has drawn me closer to God.  The circumstances aren’t always the best.  Some days are down right ugly.  Some days God shows me that the ugliness is in me.  Other days I see it in my child.  But I have learned to not sit around and say “Woe is me.”  I have learned to get down on my knees only to rise feeling more prepared for the job at hand.  
 
Dear Friends,
Pray!  Pray without ceasing!  Continue to call out on God.  Trust in who God says He is in your life.  This time of waiting is not a time that is wasted.  It is a time for your own personal growth.  God strengthens you for the journey.  Journal.  Write down your prayers and cries out to God.  Be consistent and persistent with your time with God.  Study His Word.  You will arise from this time with God not feeling broken and defeated, but equipped!  I can tell you that from personal experience after my quiet time with God that I arise overflowing with the peace that passes all understanding!  My heart fills with joy.  I have gone through and continue to go through difficult days, but without God I would have been defeated!  The waiting is a time of growing.  Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus!
 
Dear Precious Jesus,
Oh thank You for Your servant Nehemiah and the example that he is to our lives.  Thank You for the work that You did in him.  Lord help me to take my time of waiting…waiting on the next break through…waiting on pealing back the next layer to my child’s heart….waiting on the moment to see a changed attitude…knowing that You are always working.  Allow my child to see Your reflection in my actions and guard my reactions.  Please continue to feed me during this time of waiting.  Amen.
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Praying Like Nehemiah

May 9, 2013 By Leave a Comment

Read 1 Corinthians 13
 

“I said, ’Yahweh, the God of heaven, the great and awe- inspiring God who keeps His gracious covenant with those who love Him and keep His commands, 6 let Your eyes be open and Your ears be attentive to hear Your servants prayer that I now pray to You day and night for Your servants, the Israelites. I confess the sins we have committed against You. Both I and my fathers house have sinned. 7 We have acted corruptly toward You and have not kept the commands, statutes, and ordinances You gave Your servant Moses. 8 Please remember what You commanded Your servant Moses: If you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the peoples. 9 But if you return to Me and carefully observe My commands, even though your exiles were banished to the ends of the earth, I will gather them from there and bring them to the place where I chose to have My name dwell. 10 They are Your servants and Your people. You redeemed them by Your great power and strong hand. 11 Please, Lord, let Your ear be attentive to the prayer of Your servant and to that of Your servants who delight to revere Your name. Give Your servant success today, and have compassion on him in the presence of this man,’” Nehemiah 1:5-11

 
Nehemiah gives us such an example of how to pray and how to cry out for our children.  Yesterday I discussed the example Nehemiah is to us in how we need to go before God for our children in prayer; how we are to come to God weeping, mourning, fasting, and praying, not for a moment but for a time.  Today I want to begin to discuss how Nehemiah prayed and how this is an example for us.     Verse four tells us that when Nehemiah went into his time of prayer that he went “before the God of heaven.”  He moves forward acknowledging that he knows that God is great and awesome.  That God is one who keeps His word and His commands.  God is compassionate and cares for us.
 
We must study God’s Word.  The world will tell us that love is not enough for our children; that love alone cannot heal.  But I disagree.  God gave His only Son in love to take away all of our sin (John 3:16) to heal a broken world.  In 1 Corinthians 13, He gives us a beautiful chapter of the greatest gift…LOVE.  Through out this chapter God uses Paul to give us a definition of what love is and what it is not.  Paul goes on to say in verse 8 that “LOVE NEVER FAILS.”  Love will outlast all failures. It is through this definition of love in chapter 13 that we need to embrace our children.  The chapter ends by also stating that we need to hold onto faith and hope as well.  It is the combination of these three, faith, hope, and love that we will need to walk our children through to a place of healing.  
 
Before you begin to shake your head in disagreement, go back to the beginning of Nehemiah’s prayer.  He had faith and believed in God’s Word and ALL that God had promised.  It is God’s promises that we must desperately cling to.  I have seen God’s work.  I have seen God take a broken child and transform her just as He transforms a caterpillar into a beautiful butterfly.  That transformation can be slow, but remember it is in God’s perfect timing, not our own.
 
Dear Friends, I encourage you today to be like Nehemiah.  Acknowledge the greatness that God is.  But do not stop there.  Acknowledge that God’s Word is truth and that it does apply to your life.  Hold onto the promises that He gives throughout His Word.  Write it on your doorways, on your hearts, the inside of your cabinets, on your mirrors…I have a daughter who is constantly writing the Word on her hands and arms…memorizing it, choosing to believe it.  The transformation that takes place in our lives when we do this is miraculous.  
When we choose to finally believe it, half the battle is already won.Image
 Remember James tells us that we must ask in complete faith, without any doubting, because the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea being driven and tossed by the wind.  This isn’t a little faith in a little god…this is a BIG faith in the ONE TRUE GOD!  Friends keep your eyes fixed on Jesus and allow Him to begin a good work in you!
 
Dear Jesus,
I thank You for the example You give us in Nehemiah.  Help me to believe as Nehemiah believed. Help me to remember that the Bible is not full of stories…fairy tales…but that it is full of promises made by You that were not broken.  It is our GPS for this journey.  It is also a warning a what happens when I choose not to be obedient.  This journey of walking with the brokenhearted is long and hard, but You give me hinds feet for the journey.  Thank You God for Your promises.  Help me to believe without doubt!  Amen.
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Be Like Nehemiah

May 8, 2013 By Leave a Comment

They said to me, “The remnant there in the province who survived the captivity are in great distress and reproach, and the wall of Jerusalem is broken down and its gates are burned with fire.” When I heard these words, I sat down and wept and mourned for days; and I was fasting and praying before the God of heaven.  Nehemiah 1:3-4

 
God calls us to be like a Nehemiah.  When Nehemiah had heard about the Jews who had survived the captivity were in great distress and reproach he sat down and wept and mourned for days.  He fasted and prayed to God alone.  His prayer is a powerful one, but we will look at that another day. Today I want to focus on what Nehemiah did.  
 
He wept.  He mourned.  He fasted.  He prayed.  This wasn’t just for the moment.  Scripture says it was for days.  How many of us do this for our children?  They came to us in great distress and reproach.  Just like Jerusalem, they were broken down and their precious lives probably felt like they had been burned to ashes.  Nothing left.  All that they knew was gone.
 
Sure, we offered them a safer environment; a roof over their heads; food in their bellies; a loving family; we offered them hope.  But they came to us in deep pain.  Grieving.  In despair.  Broken.  Did we allow them to mourn?  Or did we demand that they jump right into the routine of our lives?  Did we grieve for them?
 
Nehemiah wasn’t in the midst of the rubble, but he allowed himself to go to a place of crying out for his fellow people.  We need to allow ourselves to do this for our children as well.  What we are going through with our children is a spiritual battlefield.  The deep woundedness allows for an open door for Satan.  He wants our children.  He tries to claim them.  But we need to claim them back!
 
It is time to put on the armor of God and realize that this is not a battle against flesh and blood, but against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places!
 
Dear Friends, I encourage you to weep for your children.  Mourn for them.  Fast and pray.   This is a battlefield where they need reinforcements.  Take on the battle with new eyes, new ears, and new hearts.  Watch and listen for opportunities to grieve with your child.  Allow your hearts to no longer be hardened but to see them in a new light.  Never give up hope and dare to love once again!  Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus!
 
Precious Jesus, I thank You for the example of Your servant, Nehemiah.  You show us through his life story how to be the servants You have called us to be.  Lord as You pour this into me, I realize that I need to deeply mourn and grieve right along with my children.  I need to allow myself to go to a deeper level of understanding my child’s brokenness.  Guide me Lord as You begin turning these ashes into beauty!  Amen.
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Upcoming Speaking Events

May 4, 2013 By Leave a Comment

Speaking at Teach Them Diligently Conference this weekend in Spartanburg, SC. We had an amazing session on Friday entitled Hope for the Adoptive Family. Saturday I speak on Responding In Faith to the Call of Adoption. It has been an amazing weekend.

I will be speaking in Valdese, NC on May 11 at 6pm for a Daring Daughters event on Responding In Faith To God’s Calling On Our Lives.

May 19-21 I will be in Nashville, TN at the next Teach Them Diligently Conference.

It’s a busy May! Looking forward to the doors God is opening up!

If you come to any of these events, please come up and say hi! My heart is to connect with families to encourage and offer hope!

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Hope In a Name

May 3, 2013 By Leave a Comment

The social worker sat across from my daughter and me. This was our final post placement visit. Her adoption was through a dissolution~an adoption that failed. We would be her second American family. She had been with us for almost a year now. Many ups and downs as we worked through trials.

The social work talked on. My mind wandered. I remembered a conversation my daughter and I had had. Forever. It meant nothing but an empty promise. A promise, I wondered, if she would ever truly understand. I have cried out to God many a night. Hoping. Seeking. Longing for God to comfort both my soul and my daughters.

“I see you are changing your middle name,” the social worker exclaimed. I snap out of my thoughts. My daughter’s face glistens as she nods her head. I look at my daughter and ask her to tell the social worker her story.

“I chose my mom’s first name…Sonya. If anything were to ever happen to her I will have a part of her to remember her by forever.”

Every time I hear this my eyes tear up. I look over to the social worker. Her eyes are flooding over. My daughter needed something tangible to hold onto. Something that could represent forever to her.

Life had already been too hard. Witnessing a birth mom thrown into a dark hole. An adoptive mom who claimed her unworthy to be in their family. Then me. Another mom. Would I be the one that would make her understand the word forever. Would I be the one that could break through the heaviness around this child’s heart?

I knew something the other mothers did not. I knew that God would not abandon us. I knew that Abba would be our help in times of dismay. I knew that God would hold us up. He would be our stronghold…our Rock!

My hope stands firm in believing that it will not be the name that will help her discover forever, but it will be the hope that we hold onto in our Lord Jesus Christ.

For the Lord will not abandon His people, Nor will He forsake His inheritance. If the Lord had not been my help, My soul would soon have dwelt in the abode of silence. If I should say, “My foot has slipped,” Your lovingkindness, O Lord, will hold me up. When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul. But the Lord has been my stronghold, And my God the rock of my refuge. (Psalms 94:14, 17-19, 22 NASB)

Sisters, Draw deeply from the well of life!  God will heal the brokenness that your child is experiencing.  He will give you the strength to show your child that you are the nurturer.  Continue to reach out, even when they push away.  Continue to reach the heart.  Its a layer at a time.  The journey is long.  I won’t lie, it is difficult.  But with your eyes fixed on Jesus, you will find the strength!
Dear Jesus,
I am so thankful that I know You as my Lord and Savior.  I am glad that I know You as healer and redeemer.  You are my rock.  If I slip, You pick me up and help me to gain hinds feet.  I love You, Lord.  Amen.
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Strength For the Journey

May 2, 2013 By Leave a Comment

This journey of parenting the Brokenhearted is a journey of seeking The Lord and His strength. I find myself daily seeking God’s face as I cry out for healing for my child. I pray for wisdom and discernment so that I might gain patience for this journey.

It is a journey of following the narrow path and not the wide one. It is a calling. And with a calling I know that it will be life long. I must daily renew my strength by spending time with my Father. Time in His Word, time in prayer, time in praise and worship. This is where I draw my strength.

Sisters, Today I want to encourage you in your parenting, whether you are an adoptive parent, foster parent, a parent of a child who is struggling in some aspect of their lives, be encouraged. You are not on this journey alone. God does hear your cries. He catches every tear in a bottle. Continue your journey in faith! I know that it is hard. I’m walking it with you. I have seen God’s hand move in mighty ways. Stay strong my friend!! Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus!

Seek the Lord and His strength; Seek His face continually. (Psalms 105:4 NASB)

Jesus, I know that You are the great healer.  Allow me to be silent in Your presence so that I can hear You.  I ask for wisdom and discernment so that I can parent this child You have birthed into my life.  Give me strength where I am weak. I love You.  Amen.
Filed Under: adoption, Healing, motherhood, parenting Tagged With:
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A Victorious Warrior

May 1, 2013 By Leave a Comment

The Lord has blessed my home with a quiver full! Many a day the children fill our living room with dancing and singing! These are the moments when all the cares of the world are drowned out by my children’s laughter. I love these moments. These moments fill me full of hope. It is during these moments that I see my children free. Free from the bondage of their past…free from the verbal, emotional or sexual abuses, free from the years of starvation and being war torn, free from fears that shouldn’t exist in a child’s mind. God shows me the heart of my children during these times and reminds me that this was how He created them…free! It was the sins of this world that entrapped them into a life filled with pain. I see hope during these moments. I catch glimpses of all of their hearts and I fall more in love with each of my fifteen children. I fall more in love with God as He whispers to my heart that He is a victorious warrior and He will win my children’s hearts! Oh the joy that overflows from my heart.
“The Lord your God is in your midst, A victorious warrior. He will exult over you with joy, He will be quiet in His love, He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy. (Zephaniah 3:17 NASB)

Dear Sisters, cling to hope!  God is victorious.  The days can seem long, but joy comes in the morning!  Rejoice today with shouts of joy for your God redeems!  Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus!
 
Lord,
I am glad that You are who You are!  You are God alone.  You are a victorious warrior who fights for the souls of the broken spirited!  Thank You for fighting for my children!  Thank You for fighting or me!  I love You, Lord! Amen!
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Daily Renewal

April 30, 2013 By 1 Comment

Daily I have to renew my strength with God. I must be daily in the Word and daily on my knees. Without His strength, I cannot parent my hurting children. The days that I find myself growing weary and faint, are the days that I miss my quiet time with God.

I pray for wisdom and discernment as the word tells me this will yield patience. Wisdom, discernment and patience are a must with any parenting.

God created my adopted children special and unique just as He did my biological children. The difference is they came from different gene pools. The expectations will be different because they will have different mannerisms and behaviors. They were knit together in their mothers’ wombs.

I think so many times as adopted parents we forget that. God has a unique plan for each of our children. Learning to seek God out and trust in Him can be difficult. God is the potter and we are the clay. We are here to guide and shape with morals and values, but God will do the main work. We are God’s tools. Being used as a tool by God can be difficult, but with God as the head potter, He guides us.

I think sometimes we can forget that we are the tool and we try to play “God”. We always want to “fix it!” It is not until we step back that God can begin His work.

I have a daughter who had been in multiple homes because of dissolution. God used me as the tool. He guided me in being persistent in grabbing a hold of her heart. She shared with me that she never felt trusted. God allowed that conversation to take place. He allowed me to see a piece of her heart. That would be our top priority. Trust. There were other issues. But those would be put on hold. Trust would be where we would start. God gave me the tools. He allowed me to see through His eyes at times.

When the words would fly from her mouth that I wasn’t her “real mom”, they didn’t sting so bad. Over time her out bursts began to get fewer. Apologies came quicker. I would humble myself and welcome her with open arms. I would remind her while she was in my arms that she was forgiven and how God brought her here for healing. I would tell her that I loved her. I could do this because my strength did not come from me, it came from God.

My sisters, do not grow weary, do not lose hope. Continue on in this journey to pursue the heart. God is your Guide! Keep your eyes fixed and Jesus and He walk you through each step of this journey!

But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31 KJV)

Dear Jesus,
I thank You for walking me through this journey of healing with my child.  I daily watch miracles as old wounds are healed.  You give me the strength to mount up with wings as eagles!  You helot me to walk and not faint.  Thank You for loving my child and for loving me!  Amen. 
Filed Under: adoption, Healing, parenting Tagged With: , , ,
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